Get your own
 diary at DiaryLand.com! contact me older entries newest entry

July 29, 2003 - 10:28 a.m.

always remember, i tell myself, leaving the asshole italian's bill on our fridge, held their by a coyly posed britney spears magnet, the paper dances at eye level so that i will not forget not to forget, so that i will not let complacency and comfort block out the world outside my pristine, pledged two bedroom sanctuary where giggles and kisses fill the air, so far away from the noise pollution of table 35 where two archaic couples spent an hour and a half eating and belching out a bigotted narrative of gay marriage's sacriledge and the triumphant narrative of his stallionesque italianess. Amongst other rantings were his assertions that he doesn't share a bed with his hottie wife and have sex with her for reasons other than procreation (i'd have smacked him for her), that if you don't have children, you have no legacy and marrriage is a right for those who will pop out babies and men who die for their countries in war ( I asked him then, if women and men who could not conceive should be prohibited from marrying and refrained from remarking that many men who fight in wars have not yet married or are leaving behind widows-to be, pregnant or not. His colourful dialogue, returned again and again to the glory of his "legacy", to his children, his son, who's girlfriend's name is also 'shayne', which thoroughly freaked me out, round about the time he told me he'd father my children and to call him when his wife was out of town. he told me i was the "girl of his dreams", and my lack of response to this caused him to consider that i might not play for the "right" team...In his opinion, gay marriage is all an economic scam, and anyone who says that they don't oppose gay marriage is just saying that so that people think they're smarter or more educated... ya think?

my favourite was, "by god's laws, these people shouldn't even exist"... funny, how'd yer food get to the table then?

Someone said i should pass off their table to another server... who? half the staff are gay, not to mention the gay couple sitting next to them.

In conclusion, my shaking hands and the wife's meek appologies for her neanderthal of a husband were assuaged by my grand finale, scooping up the billfold, fat with cash and telling them that i'm very happy they'd enjoyed their meal because now i had something to say...

i'm not offended,( i directed at the wife), that you (directed at him) implied i was a lesbian...i'm offended because i am a lesbian (it clicks) and i had to sit here for an hour and a half listening to your garbage.

I knew all along that you were a lesbian, he fumes...

why because i didn't flirt back with you???!

i've listened to all of your opinions, so now you can listen to mine...

(at this point the other gentleman advises that i should leave the table and head for the hills, so i assuage the boiling old pot with...)

it's very refreshing....TO KNOW THAT PEOPLE LIKE YOU STILL EXIST... it gives me a reason to be proud and reminds me how far we still have to go...and you keep talking about your "legacy"

"I have three children" he bursts,

.. and i'm sure they're lovely... but i''m also going to have children, and i'll raise them every day knowing that they won't ever become closed minded, homophobic bigots like you... and i made my exit sashaying away after turning primly on my heel, to the wide eyes and slack jaws of my colleagues and the aromatic stupour of stubby at 35, the sixty year old castrated stallion.

The biggest surprise was that instead of having to explain away the stir i'd caused to the manager, i found out that he was behind me the whole time. Even before i'd had words with the table he'd told patrick that it was a potentially explosive situation and to call him if it got ugly... so that he could throw the first punch. Fortunately i had a whole kitchen and bar full of people ready to do the same thing. I was glowing for days after this... and i feel like it was a step towards not backing down, a step out of my quiet girl, polite service shoes, a possible knot in the habit of putting myself out to accomodate someone else. Which brings me back to that fridge magnet... britney is a compromise that isn't compromising my integrity.

 

previous - next

 

about me - read my profile! read other Diar
yLand diaries! recommend my diary to a friend! Get
 your own fun + free diary at DiaryLand.com!