February 21, 2011 - 5:45 p.m.
I'm afraid sometimes
girlfriend
that this will cause the panic
that I will reveal too much
on purpose,
unable to stop myself, sabotaging myself,
to see whether you run screaming
whether you will really like the person I unfold
the thing that made me sad,
the one that doesn't make sense
and involves ginger snaps cookies,
when last week's ginger snap film - left us both so satiated - sated?
you make me forget to spell
check
and unedited
I am anxious about whether you will still feel the need to read me
and register on that impeccable face
the pleasure you find in seeing what is written there.
what if the genre changes and i am revealed a horror? A teen pity novel, coming of age, still - when under your hands I had fooled you into believing
beat the mind and heart of a well-adjusted, confident twenty-something
closer to thirty
I pulse, afraid of what will happen when you own this
buyers remorse..
I fear,
foundation quaking
when you own something it becomes yours to reconsider,
attained it can be assessed as something to be cherished
or not
and I am so afraid, of late,
of the not, twisted up with so much love
that I can't seem to see myself as anything
but a hard sell
how do you sum that up in a want of real
estate
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